


Resolution

by Macx



Series: Balance [6]
Category: D.N. Angel
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-05-11
Updated: 2011-05-11
Packaged: 2017-10-19 07:07:24
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 17,100
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/198235
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Macx/pseuds/Macx
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>sequel to Involution. New year is a time for resolutions... Dark and Krad have their own, and take another step in their relationship.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Resolution

 

“Sato,” Daisuke breathed, “it’s beautiful.”  
‘It’ was a house. A house Daisuke and Satoshi were currently standing in.  
Two stories high, two bedrooms on each floor. The second floor’s bedrooms and the living room connected with a large balcony from which Daisuke could see the ocean. There were an additional guest room and a bathroomon the same floor. The first floor contained two more bedrooms, a bathroom and the large kitchen. The attic could be converted and would be a nice huge atelier for Daisuke and an office for Satoshi. Though the house was old it had been recently renovated, its colors now warm and friendly, from egg-shell off-white to Mediterranean red shades in the living rooms. The upper living room  contained ceiling high shelves and had obviously been designed to be used as a library.  
“It’s a wonderful house, Sato. Why are you showing it to me?”  
“Us, Dai. If Dark and Krad approve, I’d like us to live here.”  
“What? Why?”  
Satoshi coughed slightly. Though he had recovered from the flu that had caught him four weeks ago,  he still wasn’t quite well.  
“We’re not alone anymore, Dai.”  
Daisuke stared at his lover for an entire minute, before he wrapped him in a loving embrace, kissing him gently.  
“You do make a nice father.”  
“I … what?!”  
“I like  this house, Sato. I can imagine living here with you… and it does have a garden and a terrace, too. Making love in the sunshine… listening to the sound of the waves… and have you seen the kitchen table?”  
“You’re insatiable.”  
Daisuke laughed. And went to explore the second floor. Satoshi followed a bit slower.  
//Satoshi?//  
/Yes, Krad?/  
//Why do you need a bigger house? The old one was nice//  
/As I said, we’re not alone anymore/  
//But … //  
/You two are starting to spend more and more time outside of our bodies. So, which room would you like?/  
//Room?//  
/Of course. Why do you think I chose this house? Four bedrooms, Krad. What does that tell you?/  
//But… a room?//  
/You are a living person now, Krad. You need your own privacy/  
//I can have privacy when I want to//  
/Yes, within me. In the past you wanted to have your own body, your own life. Did your wishes change?/  
There was such a long time of silence that Satoshi almost got worried, but then he felt the demon stir inside of him.  
//Some did, Sato//  
/So?/  
//Could we take a look at the room at the east side again?//  
Satoshi only smiled.

* * *

“Hey, Sato,” Daisuke beamed happily at his lover, wrapping his arms around his slender form from behind, “Mom invited us to dinner on Christmas eve.”  
“Oh joy,” Satoshi replied dryly, turning halfway to steal a kiss, before he continued chopping vegetables for their own dinner.  
“What’s wrong with a party?” Dark asked, snatching a slice of carrot, grinning at the annoyed glance this earned him.  
“The Niwa family? Together, all in the same room at the same time? That’s chaos about to happen.”  
“That’s not true and you know it.”  
Daisuke grinned, effectively distracting his lover with a nibble at his earlobe to grab a piece of green pepper for himself.  
“Stop that! Unless you don’t want something to eat.”  
“About Christmas,“ Daisuke asked, sliding onto a barstool, “are we going?”  
“Like every year,” Satoshi said, putting the food in the wok.  
“Are we going to decorate the tree?”  
“You will – like every year.”  
“Uhm-hm – and you’ll pretend that all of it doesn’t interest you the slightest. Hypocrite.”  
Satoshi sighed. “How many times do I have to tell you that I love you, I love your family, I even love Whizz … “  
“You do?” Dark cut in, causing Satoshi to glower at him.  
“…but having each and every one of them around me for a prolonged amount of time makes me want to hurt someone – badly.”  
“Liar.”  
Dark had watched his other half from the corner of his eyes.  
Krad had been silent throughout the continuing friendly bickering and was now slipping from his stool, muttering something about laying the table. Something inside of Dark clenched at the way the demon had looked, though he couldn’t put his finger on it. And unfortunately he couldn’t ask because of his foolishness Krad wouldn’t talk to him.  
“Uh, Dark?”  
“Huh?” Dark was pulled out of his thoughts when Daisuke tugged at his sleeve.  
“Hey, who’s the daydreamer here now? Mom asked if you could come over tomorrow. And no, I have no idea what she wants. Maybe she needs someone to clean the ornaments.” Dai grinned.  
Dark just shrugged. "Sure."  
He didn't want to go. He didn't want to leave Krad alone, but the demon wouldn't talk to him anyway. They were civil with each other, but ever since the kiss, Krad had withdrawn even more.  
Something would have to give soon.  
Dark was afraid to think of what it was.

* * *

Christmas day came with flurries of snow, the sun out and the temperatures just below freezing point. Daisuke and Satoshi were in good moods, which couldn't be said of their demons. Krad hadn't separated from his host for a minute and Satoshi had given up on trying to find out what was going on with his other half. Dark had been in his usual good mood, but Daisuke knew something was wrong.  
They left their house in the late afternoon and drove over to the Niwa home. Emiko greeted them with enthusiasm and warm hugs and a smile. She ushered them into the living room, which was dominated by a huge Christmas tree, and the view out of the sliding doors was incredible. The sky was a magnificent blue and the whole back garden covered in snow. A vision of perfection.  
Dark separated and inspected the wrapped gifts, getting a scolding from Emiko. Towa was buzzing around them, in a happy mood like the rest of them, though she kept shooting Satoshi little glances of unease. She and Krad hadn't met face to face yet and she probably wasn't looking forward to it.  
Satoshi settled on the couch and looked out into the white garden, smiling to himself. He loved this family, as if it was his own, but right now he needed a little bit of calmness, and he found it here. The kitchen was currently occupied by Emiko, Towa and Daisuke, with the occasional visit by Whizz who tried to beg for treats. Daikii was reading his paper, looking content in his chair.  
"Do you mind me sitting here?"  
Satoshi turned his head and smiled at Kosuke.  
Same procedure as every time, he mused. As pleasant and balanced as Kosuke appeared, he was sharp-witted, very perceptive, and he could come to the heart of the problem within no time.  
"Not at all. Smells good."  
Kosuke chuckled. "Emiko's been up and about since this morning. She insisted to cook enough to feed a small army. Well, figuring we're two more people this year, maybe it was a good idea."  
Satoshi looked out the sliding doors again. Krad had retreated into the recesses of his mind and he made no moves to actively participate. Something was troubling him and sooner or later it would tear him apart.  
//I wish you would talk to me// he muttered.  
There was only silence. He hadn't expected otherwise.  
Kosuke had fallen into the same, comfortable silence and as the two men watched the outside, it started to snow again. Laughter floated over from the kitchen and Satoshi briefly glanced into the general direction.  
“Dark’s having fun,” Kosuke remarked with a faint smile.  
“Yeah. Like a child. It’s like he never had a Christmas before.”  
Kosuke tilted his head. “He had, but this is the first time for him after his… rebirth. It’s special.”  
Satoshi looked inward at his own demon. “Yes,” he murmured. “It’s special. For all of us.”  
“He is part of it, Satoshi.”  
“I know that,” was the quiet reply.  
“And he doesn’t?”  
A smile. “I think Krad has a hard time accepting it.”  
“I see.”  
And Kosuke probably did. He saw a lot more than people thought him capable of. He was so unassuming, so mild, so… invisible. It was his strength. That and his observance.  
“He might not be able to keep on hiding for long. Emiko can be very… convincing.”  
Satoshi chuckled. He remembered his own first Christmas here. It had floored him, it had stolen his cool, his collected behavior, and it had opened him up for the possibility of a normal family life. He loved the Niwas.  
"Dinner's ready!" Emiko called and walked over to them, smiling.  
Kosuke rose and gave his wife a little kiss, then nodded at Satoshi. Hikari looked up at his surrogate mother, his partner’s mother, and Emiko tilted her head questioningly.  
//Krad? She wants you to be her guest//  
There was a little shift and Krad seemed to uncurl from his position. //Why?//  
//Ask her yourself//  
It got him a glare.  
//Krad… it's a family dinner and you, as well as Dark, are part of this family now// He turned to his reluctant partner and held out a hand. //Come//  
//Why should I be part of it?//  
//Because you’re mine. I am part of this family. Maybe not by name, but I am//  
Krad sent a shiver through him. Finally there was a shift and Satoshi felt the tingle of the separation. Emiko’s eyes met those of the demon and her smile was warm and inviting.  
“Thank you,” she said sincerely.  
Krad didn’t reply. Satoshi simply rose and gave him a gentle push, glad his partner had thought of leaving his wings off. They walked to the table where Dark was having fun with Whizz. Krad chose the seat at the other end of where Dark sat and Satoshi noted the brief flash of hurt in Dark’s eyes before the kaitou turned back to the demon familiar. Towa just avoided looking at him, her face paler than before. She was an artwork like them, but she had never seen anything but an enemy in Krad. The demon wasn't fazed by it at all. He generally ignored her.  
Something has to give, Satoshi thought again. And it was giving. Slowly. It was breaking Dark…

* * *

Emiko wasn't blind. She was a woman. A mother, too. And a wife. She had instincts and she intuition. Watching Krad throughout the evening, his laid back nature, the glances he shot Dark and how he tried to be inconspicuous and melt into the background, it all seemed to fall into place one after the other.  
Then there had been his reaction to the gift. Like a child that had received its first present ever, that couldn’t believe anyone would actually give it something. It was an apt description of the situation. Still… the differences between Dark and Krad had never been more pronounced.  
Towa's behavior didn't help. The magical being was almost hostile when it came to Krad, didn't talk to him, and refused to look at the demon in their midst. She had quickly volunteered to clean up whatever needed cleaning, and she barely stayed within reaching distance of Krad.  
"Dai?" Emiko asked softly as she and Daisuke were tidying up the kitchen and stocking the dishwasher.  
"Hm?"  
"What's the problem between Dark and Krad?"  
Daisuke sighed and reached for the dishwashing liquid. "I wish I knew, Mom. I mean, there was trouble over something that I can't really tell you right now. But I think they reached an understanding.  Something happened between them again and this time… I mean, Dark's running around like a whipped puppy, and Krad's…"  
She nodded. "I noticed. Did you notice the looks between them?"  
Daisuke nodded.  
"And?"  
He looked at his mother. "And what?"  
Emiko sighed and shook her head. "Oh, Dai-chan. For someone who went through almost the same, you're really blind."  
"Mom?"  
"There is something between them, Daisuke. Something that happened to you and Satoshi, too."  
He stared at her, open-mouthed. "No way! Mom, they're…"  
"Living and breathing individuals who have feelings, who feel emotions… and who can love."  
"But…"  
"Do you think it's so impossible?" his mother asked calmly. "Wasn't the same said about you and Satoshi?"  
Daisuke leaned against the dishwasher, slightly shocked. "You think they… they fell in love or something?"  
"Or something." Emiko wiped down the kitchen counter. "Dai, you've got to be blind not to see it. Dark's trying to be close to Krad and Krad is… not exactly evading him, but something is wrong. I'm not saying they feel exactly like us. They are magical entities after all. But their hosts were always human, their feelings are, too." She smiled. "Well, my maternal instincts tell me that whatever happened between them, it has Krad confused and Dark in a loop. Everything that's going to happen starts and ends with Krad's decision, Dai-chan."  
"Wow," Daisuke just muttered, running a hand through his tousled hair. "This is… something. I just can't imagine them… well… together."  
"They were once," the voice of his father startled him.  
Daisuke shot the other man a surprised look. Kosuke just smiled that strange little smile.  
"Don't mind me. Just getting myself a glass."  
He opened the cabinet and took out the item he had been looking for.  
"The Black Wings was a piece of art that combined love and adoration of two different souls," Kosuke continued as he filled the glass with water. "It gave birth to two different entities, but they were always drawn to each other. I think this is what we're witnessing now. The battle has been going on for three hundred years and it's still happening, just on another level."  
With that he left the kitchen and Emiko smiled warmly. "Your father is right. What Dark and Krad are going through… it's a healing process. It's finally happening and probably confusing as hell."  
Daisuke nodded slowly. "So… what should we do?"  
"What you've done so far: be there for them. Now you know what the reason is. I think you can aide them better than before."  
Walking back into the living room he found Satoshi and Krad gone. Of course, with Krad that could mean he had merged again, but where was his lover?  
Daikii just nodded wordlessly toward the terrace. "Getting fresh air, the two of them," he remarked.

* * *

Krad had removed himself from the gathering in the living room, choosing the snow-covered terrace that led into an equally snow-covered garden. The voices from inside were a muffled background noise, and he looked at the clear night sky. The urge to spread his wings and fly was rising.  
He had to get away from here.  
He had to get some air.  
But Satoshi was here and it was a family gathering. Satoshi liked it here. He wanted to be here. He was enjoying himself.  
Krad didn’t feel like it was his family or anything remotely like it. He didn’t feel the attachment Satoshi did. His host had a partner, he had a family, but Krad... only had his host and in a way he felt rather lonely. He didn't mind the cold, almost hateful looks from Towa. She didn't matter to him; she was of no consequence.  
He thought of the dark blue sweater that had been his gift from Emiko. And the matching jeans. He didn’t know what to feel about that. He had no idea what to feel at all. It was the first time someone had given him anything without expecting something in return. No strings attached. Just an expression of... what? Had she felt it was her duty to give him something? Why clothing? Why insist that he be here for this gathering, for this Christmas?  
Dark was part of the Niwas. He had been with them for centuries. Krad had been the enemy. Why give him gifts as if nothing had ever happened? It was so incredibly confusing.  
It couldn’t be just because he was Satoshi’s… right?  
Krad sighed.  
Too much was happening to him. Too much had changed.  
Then there was the sketchbook. Satoshi had given it to him. His host had given him a present. Him… the demon… the nightmare of his childhood.  
Krad's fingers ghosted over the simple piece of working material. It was nothing special, nothing expensive, but it was everything to him, filled him with wonder and joy and something else that he found hard to describe.  
Soft steps alerted him to an approaching presence, but he didn’t feel alarmed. He almost instinctively recognized his host and when the warm hand touched him, all his senses reached out and wrapped themselves around the young man.  
"You okay?“ he asked.  
"Yes.“  
His tamer stepped to his side, gazing out at the glittering ocean. “They can be a little overwhelming sometimes,” he said softly, and Krad nodded.  
“A little.”  
Satoshi chuckled. “Can you imagine how I felt when I came here first, after you two had vanished and the Black Wings had been destroyed? Daisuke and I were becoming friends, he and Riku were getting together, and I spent some more time with Risa. It was kinda – comforting, these were the only people who knew about you and Dark, and they understood. As did the Niwas, though Emiko is something else.”  
“She’s a mother hen from hell.”  
“Yeah. But you called her when I was sick.”  
“I was worried about you, Satoshi.”  
“Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate that.”  
There was a moment of silence when Satoshi’s eyes were resting on him, his face unreadable. Krad moved uneasily, finally looking at the young man. Blue eyes regarded him steadily, seriously.  
“Is there something… you might wanna talk about?”  
Another shift. “What do you mean?”  
“Dark.”  
Krad evaded those all-too knowing eyes, instead gazing out over the dark ocean. “I told you we made up.”  
“But you still don’t talk.”  
Silence. Then,  “Looks like it.”  
Krad heard Satoshi exhale and shrugged inwardly. He couldn’t talk about it, he simply couldn’t. Too confused by his own emotions, the warmth tingling inside him when he just thought about the feeling of Dark’s soft lips on his, too overwhelmed by the sheer thought that Dark, his other half, the man he had hated for such a long time, might actually – have feelings for him. Sheesh, he couldn’t even think the ‘l’ word.  
Not to mention the way his life had changed during the past months. Hell, he actually had a life.  
His host apparently accepted the brisk words, giving him a privacy he wasn't used to. It always surprised him anew how… kind he was.  
Krad blinked and found Satoshi staring off into space.  
“Satoshi?”  
“Life is good, Krad. Living life is good. I feel it especially at moments like these – being here with a family, although it’s not mine. At moments like this I wonder what my mother would look like. Would she cook dinner like Emiko? Would she have bought you a pullover or knitted a scarf? Would she have approved of me loving a man? I can't even remotely remember her face. And I never knew about my father.”  
Krad glanced at him. "You don't?" he queried.  
"No. I was too young to remember him."  
The demon looked at him with a strange expression. "Kei never told you?”  
Satoshi’s head snapped around. “What?”  
Krad tilted his head a little. “Kei never told you about your father? I mean after all the research he did…"  
“What research? What are you talking about?”  Hikari demanded.  
“Satoshi, your biological father is still alive. Hiwatari knew that, he had an entire essay about the man.”  
Satoshi felt the ground slip-slide away from under him. “What… how do you know...?”  
The demon looked slightly bemused. “I saw it once, when… In the past I used to come out and talk to Kei when you were asleep." He shifted uneasily at that confession, but Satoshi didn't react to the sudden revelation. Something else was pressing on his mind. "I saw the file on his desk once and read it. I didn’t see it back then, but now… you’re so much like your father… especially the eyes.”  
“Do you… do you know his name?” Satoshi whispered hoarsely, the world starting to spin now.  
“Yes. It's… “  
“No!” Satoshi stopped Krad with a gesture. “I don’t want to know, not now. This is… whoa. This is really something.”  
He had to lean against the low wall that encircled the Niwa property, staring off into the black ocean.  
“I’m sorry, Satoshi, I didn’t mean to… “  
“It’s okay, Krad. Will you tell me should I ask?” A dim smile accompanied the question.  
“Of course… Satoshi, I really had no idea…“  
“It’s okay, Krad. It's okay.”  
Both men ended up staring into the night’s sky, each engrossed in his own thoughts. The cool air brushed over him and Satoshi shivered a little. At the tiny tremors, he felt arms hesitantly close around him from behind, like Krad had done some times when he had been younger -- and he didn’t fight them off. Instead he leaned into the embrace of his demon – the only person alive he shared his childhood with.  
Krad rested his face against Satoshi's head, an intimate but completely non-sexual gesture. To everyone who had no idea about their relationship, it would be the embrace of lovers. He felt warm, protected, comfortable, and completely at ease.  
Maybe they were lovers, in a strange sort of way, Satoshi mused with a fine smile. They were so close, connected, bound together. Krad shared his consciousness, his dreams if he wanted to, his essence.  
“Satoshi? I want… to thank you.”  
He twisted his head a little, looking into the reflecting pools of gold. “For the sketchbook? I noticed you were trying, and you’re good.”  
“No, not the sketchbook." Krad hugged him close. "The greatest gift of all,” he whispered into his ear.  
At the tone of voice, Satoshi turned to look at his demon in puzzlement. “Krad? It’s only a Christmas present.”  
Serious golden eyes regarded him solemnly. “The greatest gift I got was life. You could have left me there.”  
Satoshi answered the expression with a solemn one of his own. “It would have killed us all.”  
“I understand that was your reason at that time, but… you took me back, Satoshi. You protected me when the second attack came. You had an offer to be free.”  
Satoshi felt something inside of him twist at the very thought. He reached up and touched the handsome face.  
"It wasn't freedom. What that thing offered was murder. I hated you, Krad, for everything you had done to me. I didn't know any better. I just felt this hatred and rage, but I couldn't condone a murder. Yes, I would have given everything to have you removed, but not your life."  
Krad swallowed hard. "Satoshi…"  
"You said it in that realm. There is a balance between us. All four of us. Removing even a quarter would upset it. I understood that only too well." He smiled ruefully. "Even though I did something foolish at some point, but we all did."  
Krad covered the slender hand with his own and pulled Satoshi into a embrace again. "I'm glad you're alive. I'm glad you're my host, Hikari Satoshi," he murmured. "You belong only to me. You're my life. You're everything to me.."  
Satoshi didn't cringe at the possessive words as he had done before. He felt something inside of him curl with warmth and happiness coursed through him. They had come an incredibly long way, faltering several times, but they had made it here. At the moment it was as if they were encased in the large, white wings, though Krad didn't have them out.  
The clearing of a throat behind them made Satoshi turn a little, looking into his lover’s twinkling eyes. Daisuke grinned at the two men locked in a very intimate embrace. Satoshi had no qualms and didn't push away from the reassuring warmth of his demon, stammering excuses. Their relationship was special, like Daisuke and Dark's. Special and different from everything he had ever thought possible,  
“Uhm, Krad, I don’t mind you keeping my lover warm, but could you give him back to me now?”  Daisuke teased.  
Krad opened his arms and smiled a little. "Of course."  
Satoshi patted the other's chest, blue eyes meeting golden ones in a moment of complte trust, understanding and warmth. Krad's fingers trailed over his skin as he removed himself from the embrace, and Satoshi walked over to Daisuke, pressing a little kiss on his lips.  
"Jealous?" he breathed.  
"Nah. Envious. C'mon, I need to show you something."  
Satoshi followed, curious, but he quickly glanced at Krad, who had remained standing where he was. There was a little smile on the pale features, both happy and longing, and Satoshi felt a spark of realization blossom.  
Daisuke led him through the living room and into the kitchen, which was now spotless and empty, except for Whizz, who was happily munching on some cookies.  
"Something wrong?" Satoshi asked.  
"Yes and no. I think I know what's wrong with our two demons."  
"You do?"  
Daisuke grinned a little sheepishly. "Actually, it was Mom who found out. She thinks they're… well… in love."  
Satoshi froze, the words trickling past his ear and into his mind. "Wh… what?" he stammered.  
"Dark is in love with Krad, or at least he behaves like it, and Krad's probably horribly confused."  
Satoshi had to sit down on a kitchen stool. "Damn, that explains a few things," he muttered.  
"Yep."  
“Now what?”  
“Actually, I’ve got no idea…”

* * *

Krad hadn’t come back in.  
Satoshi hadn’t gone out to get him.  
And the Niwas had accepted the decision of their latest family addition to be alone. Emiko had cast a few glances toward the dark garden, but she hadn’t asked or walked out there to get Krad inside.  
It was time to go now and Daisuke shot Dark meaningful looks, finally giving him a little push and muttering, ‘Go, damnit!’. The kaitou had hesitated once more, then gone.  
Now he stood in the cold night, feeling no more discomfort than in a sweltering day. It paid to be a magical being sometimes. Krad had chosen a spot outside the direct line of sight from the house and Dark approached him silently. The demon almost merged with the darkness despite the blond hair and the light clothing. Golden eyes glowed a little in the starlight of the clear night, looking at Dark with no expression at all.  
They gazed at each other, silent, neither one moving. Finally Dark smiled a little.  
“We missed you in there.”  
Krad’s expression didn’t change.  
“I missed you, too,” Dark added softly.  
The inhuman eyes wavered and the demon looked away. “I was here,” he murmured.  
Dark stepped closer, beside him, eyes drawn to the star-speckled sky. It was a wonderful night.  
“It’s beautiful,” he whispered. “So… silent. Like another world. No worries, no expectations… just you and the universe.”  
Krad glanced at him and Dark shot him a grin. The demon twitched a smile.  
“I was more thinking along the lines of no one fussing over me. I… I’m not used to that.”  
“It can be overwhelming,” Dark agreed.  
“Satoshi said the same.”  
“Well, you two are alike in that way.”  
Krad glanced at him again, then exhaled softly. But he didn’t say anything. The silence grew.  
“Krad…” Dark started, reaching out for him, then hesitated.  
He didn't want to enter Krad's personal space. Too much had happened between them and too much was still happening.  
"Can we... talk?“ he probed carefully.  
"What about?“  
"Us.“  
Dark held his breath and waited. Krad’s brows dipped a little deeper and he glanced at the kaitou.  
"Krad? Please... I just want you to know... explain...“  
"I’m not sure you can.“  
Dark stared at his hands. "I don’t want to lose you, Krad. I don’t want anything bad between us.“  
"We had only bad things between us for three hundred years,“ Krad remarked.  
Dark’s eyes widened a little. "Krad... it’s the past. We can’t forget it, but we also shouldn’t return to it. If you want to hit me for what I did, do it. If you want to scream at me, be my guest. Just... talk to me? I can’t take this...“  
Golden eyes stopped him mid-sentence and Dark felt himself falling into them. When had those eyes turned from alien and predatory, lethal and dangerous, to warm pools that he wanted to sink into? When had he started to think of ways to make the other smile?  
"I don’t know what you expect of me, Dark.“  
"Let me be your friend.“  
There was a long second of silence. "Is that all?“  
The kaitou inhaled deeply. "It’s a start, right? I feel more... you know that. If you’re not sure or don’t want it... it’s okay.“  
"I’m not sure what I want, Dark. Everything is so confusing.“  
Dark wanted to reach out, take the demon into his arms like he had done before in the mind realm, but now it seemed wrong. Krad’s eyes held his again.  
"You feel good, Dark. Your presence... and when you touched me... but I don’t know if what you expect of me is what you’ll get.“  
Dark’s fingers touched the closest arm and when Krad didn’t pull away, he felt encouraged.  
"I just want you to be yourself, Krad. I want us to be together...“  
Krad looked at the fingers touching him and Dark pulled his hand away, only to have it snatched by a strong grip.  
"How can you trust me, kaitou?“ he asked, voice intense. "How can you trust me not to hurt what you feel? I did it before.“  
Dark blinked, then shook his head. "It wasn’t your mistake alone. I was... unrational. I don’t want that between us, Krad. Please... don’t hide from me. Don’t ignore me. It hurts. Everywhere. I... really need you.“  
The demon was still holding his wrist, staring at him as if he had lost his mind, and Dark was hard pressed not to just lean forward and kiss him again. Krad touched his face and Dark held his breath.  
"I don’t want to hurt you,“ the demon whispered.  
Dark kissed the fingers brushing over his lips and Krad inhaled sharply. The golden eyes flared a little.  
"You won’t.“  
Dark leaned forward and touched his lips against Krad’s. He wasn’t trying to kiss him, just initiate the contact. When his counterpart didn’t move away, he kissed him gently. His arms came around the slender form and he pulled him close, just wanting the embrace, nothing more. He had to go slow. For Krad’s sake and for his own. Despite Krad’s apparent reservations, Dark had no more experience in these matters than the demon. His hosts had shown him what to do, but himself he had never done it. Never. It felt right, though. It felt good and relaxing.  
Together, he mused. In a completely new way.  
“Krad, I… I want to be close to you,” Dark whispered. “I want…” He stopped and sighed. “Maybe that’s the problem. It’s only me… I want something. What do you want?”  
Hope swung in his voice, hope and fear. He didn’t want to lose Krad in any way. He wanted him so badly, to be close… and to touch him.  
Golden eyes closed and Krad exhaled slowly. “I don’t know, Dark.”  
Dark felt something inside of him twist with fear.  
“I never had a life,” Krad went on. “I never had freedom. I never had… choices.”  
Suddenly the hand Dark was covering turned and Krad entwined their finger, looking at the small union. Dark held his breath, while inside he was crying with happiness at the gesture.  
“I want to make choices. I want to live,” the demon continued softly. “Everything is too confusing right now.”  
“I don’t want to force you into anything, Krad. It’s the last thing on my mind.”  
“I know.” A genuine smile crossed the handsome features. "Thank you, Dark."  
The fingers entwined with his squeezed his hand.  
"Uh… Daisuke and Satoshi are leaving for home," Dark said after a moment. "I think we shouldn't keep them waiting."  
Krad nodded, not letting go of the hand. They only parted when they neared the house and Dark shot his other half a little smile, walking in first. Krad followed into the warmth of the Niwa home.

* * *

Two days had passed since Christmas and relationships between Dark and Krad were advancing. Daisuke and Satoshi were keeping keen eyes on their demons, noting the small steps, the little gestures when the two were out of their hosts, and it gave them hope. Still, there was hesitation on Krad’s part and Daisuke thought he knew why. What he was pondering was a huge step in his life, a decision that could change everything.  
And it was a decision he was afraid of making. Niwa knew how that felt. He had been troubled by such a decision himself a few years back. So maybe he was the one to help.  
Daisuke found Krad at his favorite place in the attic. Sitting in the triangular window, the demon looked outside and let his pen glide over the paper before looking up again. A small frown formed on his forehead. Daisuke couldn’t resist risking a peek over the demon’s shoulder.  
“Wow,” he murmured as he saw the rough sketch.  
While it wasn’t finished yet, it looked very good. Just the wintery landscape outside, just the trees and the snow, but it was wonderful.  
“That’s not wow,” Krad muttered with disgust. “Something’s wrong.”  
Daisuke tilted his head. “Hm, I know what you mean. You have the angle wrong here… and here. If you change this…“  
He took the pencil, showing him what he meant, and Krad nodded in surprise.  
Krad was silent for a moment, then nodded. “You’re right. That was wrong.”  
“Maybe it’s because you try to sketch it how you’ve seen it – from above. But that’s a really interesting view. You’re a Hikari after all.”  
“I’m not a Hikari,” was the soft reply. “I don’t bear that name.”  
“You do. You never had any other. You are Krad and you’re a Hikari, just like Dark’s a Niwa.”  
The demon looked at him, golden eyes filled with mixed emotions. He put the sketchbook away, while Daisuke snuggled into the large couch chair. He regarded Krad thoughtfully. The entity had lost all his ‘demonic’ attire lately. Since they had moved into their new home, Krad had even changed his preferred colors. He wasn’t wearing white all the time – and damn, if those washed-out jeans didn’t look good on him. Like Dark he was sex on legs if he wanted to. Dark flaunted his assetts, he loved the looks he got, while Krad just wasn’t used to that kind of attention. Maybe that was part of the problem, too? So much was cascading down on him and he was so ill-equipped to deal with it.  
Daisuke studied the silent demon. If it weren’t for the eyes… he could be doubling for a human, just like Dark.  
“Krad?” he asked, breaking the silence.  
“Hm?”  
“Say… you can control the energy your form is mainly made of, can you not?”  
Krad shot him a quizzical look.  
“I mean… you can grow out your hair, change the current style back to the old one if you want to?”  
“Sure.”  
“Can you change your eye color?”  
Krad gazed at him for a second and blinked. “Like this?”  
“Whoa…“  
Daisuke almost fell off the chair the moment he looked into the suddenly human blue eyes of the demon. Not unlike Satoshi’s in intensity, but not as dark. The effect was astounding… and something inside him happily announced that if not for Satoshi, damn, this guy would interest him.  
Shit. Down, boy! he chided himself.  
“Holy… Krad, you… you look great.”  
Krad blinked again and the eyes were restored to their usual feline golden color.  
“And you should wear jeans more often, they really fit you. Makes you look… real nice.”  
“Are you implying something, Niwa?” Krad asked dryly.  
Daisuke grinned widely. “Well, I’m usually much more reserved when it comes to complimenting a guy who has tried to strangle me once… but hey…”  
Krad gave him a sarcastic smile. “So I’m lucky, huh?”  He turned away, eyes gazing out the window again.  
Daisuke didn’t reply. Instead he watched the demon staring out into the evening. It had started to snow once more.  
“I think you are, Krad,” he said after a while, voice soft and warm.  
Krad didn’t look at him. “I don’t know what you mean,” he muttered.  
“It’s not easy, though, is it? You don’t know how to handle this.”  
He kept staring out of the window, still ethereal in a way, still not completely human despite his almost human appearance. But he was so much more human than Daisuke could ever have pictured him in his mind. He loved and he hated, he felt like them, he had all the emotions; emotions with which he had just started to get acquainted with.  
Finally Krad sighed almost inaudibly.  
“Your room – it’s empty except for the bed. Why don’t you choose some furniture, pictures, whatever?” Niwa wanted to know.  
“I don’t need all these things. I… wouldn't know what to do with them.”  
“You never had something for your own?”  
Krad glanced at him and shook his head. There was a strange expression in those alien eyes. Confusion, need to know, embarrassment, hunger, despair…  
You never had any possessions. Not even freedom. Your life was not your own. Your existence was not your own. You had a name, a function… that was it. But you wanted Satoshi to be your possession, Daisuke thought sadly. You wanted him for yourself. His body. His soul. What would you have done if you had reached your goal? You never had a real plan, right? You only took it one step at a time, trying to find an identity… a reason to live.  
“You do now. Something very precious, too. You are holding his heart, Krad.”  
“What are you talking about?” The demon looked away defensively.  
“Let me tell you something, Krad. About my life… Satoshi’s life… how those lives entwined even more than they already had after you and Dark had vanished into the Black Wings. He and became friends, I was with Riku, he was with Risa for a short time, then they parted. Much later he told me why. It was when we became roommates at the University.”  
“Why did he go back?” Krad asked quietly. “He already had a degree.”  
Daisuke smiled slightly. “Yes, but back then he had been a kid among older students. He was always alone, he did what had been expected of him… he had had no childhood and so on. We talked about him coming with me to university and I was a bit surprised that he wanted to. What didn’t really come as a shock was that he was gay. In a way I had known all along. I didn’t mind. He was my best friend. Well, and then Riku told me she and her family would move. I still remember the last night we had together…”  
“Daisuke, I really don’t need to hear about your love life…“ Krad growled softly, brows drawn together over annoyed golden eyes.  
Daisuke gave him a very much Dark-like, cheeky smile. “Oh, but I think you do… “

 _//Daisuke looked aimlessly around the dark bar when his eyes were caught by a movement in a near by booth. The two people sitting there were definitely having a good time – and both were absolutely male. But what really caught his eye the most was the long blond hair of one participant, bound in a pony tail._   
_It looked so much like…_   
_No… not here…_   
_The other man, at least ten years older than the blond, just from the looks of it, tried to perform a tonsillectomy on his partner, while strong male hands were wandering over the body in  - for Daisuke’s eyes  - an almost possessive way. His partner didn’t seem to mind, carding his hands through the thick black hair of the other._   
_Daisuke felt warmth coil in his lower regions, but at the same time couldn’t turn his gaze away from the couple. The black haired guy meanwhile had worked himself down the neck of his partner, and his hand was... Daisuke’s eyes widened as thee followed the path of that hand downward, and then land between his partner’s legs. Daisuke couldn’t see much but the movement was crystal clear. Hot damn… his partner seemed to like it, too, because he threw his head back and moaned silently._   
_Daisuke almost spilled his drink._   
_He didn’t just look like Satoshi._   
_It was Satoshi.//_

“Satoshi? My Satoshi?” Krad interrupted, sounding utterly shocked, eyes wide.  
Daisuke smiled at the possessive tone and nodded. "Yes, your Satoshi. My Satoshi."  
Ours. We share him, my friend.  
Satoshi who had been such a private child, who had pulled away from crowds, and who now was on display, having someone’s hand almost down his pants.  
Daisuke had to smile more when he noticed the jealousy rise in the other's eyes, noticing the tension. He wondered what Krad would have done if he and Satoshi had just now found together, after they had gotten back their demons. Would he have tried to keep Satoshi for himself? Would he have shared? Krad was and always would be possessive of the young man who was his host, and it was understandable. The reason behind the behavior was understood and accepted.  
“Apparently he was bar hopping," Daisuke said, pushing that thought away,  "picking up guys or let himself get picked up. Not a nice thought… but I had to admit I never gave it any thought whatsoever. I mean what being gay would mean for him. But it gets even better – because I didn’t even remotely imagined my reaction…”

 _//Mesmerized Daisuke watched the man’s hand in his roommate’s crotch, rubbing teasingly, watched Satoshi close his eyes, the expression on his face, his hips twitching into the other guy’s hand before he took the man’s wrist and pulled the hand away. The older guy took his face into his hands, kissed Satoshi and whispered something into his ear. Satoshi answered – it looked like a declination – and the man let his hand wander down his body once more, rubbing over the obvious erection again. Satoshi pulled it away again, harder this time – Daisuke found himself almost jumping from his seat and caught himself in time. What the hell was he doing? Satoshi seemed to argue with the other guy and he nodded, nipping at his earlobe which made Satoshi shudder. Then both men grabbed their jackets and Daisuke tried to sink into his drink, not wanting Satoshi to know he was here and had seen the entire encounter. Both men left, and Daisuke sipped at his drink, thoughtful. He didn’t need much imagination to know what would follow  - and something curled inside of him at the very thought._   
_And it wasn’t a nice feeling._   
_Riku appeared at his side, smiling at him and stealing a little kiss. Daisuke smiled back, looking into those deep brown eyes of his girl friend, eyes he could drown in – but he saw only sharp blue ones._   
_What was going on here?_   
_Why did he feel… jealous?_   
_And why did he want to run after Satoshi and push the other man away?_

 _Coming home that night Daisuke was surprised to see the apartment lit – his roommate wouldn’t have brought his entertainment home, now would he?_   
_“Satoshi? You home?” he called when entering the hallway, just to be on the safe side._   
_“Of course I am. Who did you expect?” his roommate answered from the living room._   
_Daisuke had to keep himself from staring, looking at the way the other man was sitting on the couch, typing on his laptop, looking as if butter wouldn’t melt in his mouth – whatever he might have done with that mouth tonight…_   
_Oh hell, get a grip, Niwa Daisuke! You knew Satoshi’s preferences, for goodness sake, so why make a fuss over it now?_   
_“Didn’t you want to go out tonight, too?” Daisuke asked as levelly as he could muster._   
_Blue eyes regarded him curiously._   
_“No, not really. Had a little talk with a friend who was passing through tonight, but I cut it short. Why do you ask?”_   
_“No specific reason. Man, I’m hungry. Wanna share a pizza?“_   
_“Sure.“_   
_Daisuke grinned and got the portable, speed-dialing their favorite pizza place for delivery. He was aware of the eyes on him, of the strange expression, but Satoshi didn't ask, nor press the matter._

 _* * *_

 _Ten days later he visited Riku in her new home. It was the time they both came to the conclusion that their relationship wouldn't last. In the last three months things had changed between them and while they had still gone out together, it didn't feel right any more._   
_'Let's be friends' had ended the two and a half years of being lovers._   
_And Daisuke planned to remain friends. He didn't want to lose either of the twins as such because he liked them, but it still hurt a little bit._   
_Coming home, he found Satoshi had gone out. A post-it note told him so. Oh well… a beer, some leftovers from the freezer, a good movie, and he would have a great weekend by himself. Maybe he would go out and see if he found some of his own friends at the usual hang-outs. Maybe he'd just hole up here and play couch potato._

 _*_

 _Daisuke let his hands wander down between his legs, breath hitching in his throat when he closed his fingers around his own hardness, and started a slow well-known motion, teasing himself a little, wanting to draw this out. Closing his eyes he let his mind wander, waiting for the images his imagination usually provided him with – shapely curves, tiny bits of underwear…  blue eyes, long light brown hair, an expression of rapture, his hands touching soft skin under the shirt, hearing the rich voice moan in his throat… moaning himself as hands did wonderful things to him…_   
_Daisuke’s eyes flew open, his hand away from his crotch, and he gasped in shock._   
_What the hell… ? Since when was he having wet fantasies about his gay roommate and best friend of five years?! Who was sleeping in the next room, on top of that, for crying out loud!_   
_Images of Satoshi getting it on with the older guy in the bar popped up in his mind, images of what they for sure had done later, letting Daisuke feel a mixture of shame for peeping and  - jealousy?_   
_It shouldn’t have been a nameless older guy who put that look on Satoshi’s face, a little voice whispered in his mind, it should have been you._   
_Now where was that coming from?_   
_Daisuke pondered the thought for a second, reminded by little Daisuke that he indeed didn’t have anything against the very thought. Well, only one way to find out._   
_Daisuke closed his eyes, hesitantly reaching for his hardness again, picturing Satoshi as he knew him, had seen him many times before, coming from the bathroom, freshly showered, long hair not yet tied in his usual pony tail, dressed in nothing but a towel… his hips twitched and Daisuke gasped with the sensation of heat curling in his groin again. Intense blue eyes looking at him, expression unreadable, making his heart hammer in his chest – Satoshi had been able to do that since he was fourteen, with just one look. Holy…_   
_Daisuke moaned, picking up speed. Hands roaming over his body, lips at his neck, and god, they were far from female, and then Satoshi’s fingers closing around him, blue eyes sparkling with an inner fire he knew so well, Satoshi moving… caressing him…_   
_Daisuke had to bite into the pillow to muffle his scream as he came, as hard as he hadn’t in...  well, never._   
_By thinking of his best friend…//_

“You were turned on by Satoshi? That much you…“  
Krad made a slight gesture. Daisuke had to grin at the nice shade of pink the demon’s face had turned into. He was actually blushing.  
“I sure was… still am, if you want to know.”  
"Too much information," was the muttered reply, but Krad's eyes glinted a little.  
“I had only been with girls before and it was confusing me like hell, all these emotions. But there was a friend…“

 _//“Hmm, it’s a shame to let such a great behind go to waste.”_   
_Emmett almost purred, watching Satoshi leaving the room. Daisuke glowered at the young man, almost bristling. Emmett was one of Satoshi’s rare friends, from the USA and studying at the University for some semesters – and he was as gay as they came._   
_“Emmett,” Daisuke growled._   
_“What?” the other man laughed, running his fingers through his shoulder length blond hair in an almost affected gesture. “Don’t you think he has a gorgeous behind?”_   
_“That’s not the point.”_   
_“Oh, but I think it’s exactly the point,” Emmett grinned, then suddenly grew serious. “Dai-chan, how long do you plan on letting him wait?”_   
_“Huh? What’s that supposed to mean?”_   
_“Daisuke.” Emmett looked at him intensely. “Don’t tell me you don’t know. Satoshi is a fine young man – and I don’t mean the body; most guys would die for a body like this. Especially in their arms… no, don’t glower. Satoshi is waiting for you, idiot.”_   
_“And how would you know that? Besides I’m not gay.”_   
_”Suuuure. Neither am I. Honey, you’re soooo in denial, it bites you in the – uhm, nose.  How would I know? Easy, sweetheart – he told me.”_   
_Daisuke almost spat out his coffee._   
_“He did what?!” he coughed, trying his best to ignore the hand clapping his back._   
_“Not in that many words. Well, it was like this…  we had this absolutely divine encounter – and let me tell you, you’re missing something here, that guy can make the earth move …”_   
_Daisuke shuddered. And glowered. Emmett grinned._   
_“I’m joking, don’t bite me. No, we never have, and believe me, not because of a lack of trying on my part. I never got to see that nice behind. Well, I was allowed to touch… okay, not what you want to hear, I got it. The significant part is, we talked. Long. I mean, look at him and look at me – don’t tell me you never asked yourself why he befriended me. See, that’s what I thought. That night, he needed someone to talk and ended up with me. He was not crying his heart out, that’s not Satoshi’s style, but he was trying to drown his sorrows, and I picked him up. He told me about everything, about his friend he fell in love with four years ago when he first laid eyes on the guy, and so on. He didn’t exactly mention your name, but the way he talked about the guy, it could only be you. So, Daisuke honey, if I were you, I’d make my move before he gives up waiting.”_   
_Daisuke didn’t get the chance to reply because Satoshi chose that moment to return._   
_“What were you guys talking about?”_   
_“Why, Sato-chan, about that absolutely fabulous rear end of yours, of course. What?” Emmett cried laughing as a paper landed on his head. “Only telling the truth, you do have a fabulous… hey!”_   
_Satoshi had placed the paper with absolute precision._   
_“Okay, you don’t, better? Now, ladies, if you'll excuse me, I just spotted someone I don’t know yet … hel-looo … “_   
_Daisuke stared after Emmett trying to charm a well-built brunette, shaking his head._   
_Whirlwind Emmett._   
_But he had got him thinking._   
  
_*_

 _The days that followed the meeting with Emmett Daisuke found himself watching his best friend more closely – and feeling more and more confused about the feelings that evoke._   
_One day he barely caught himself before he would run his fingers over Satoshi’s arm as he explained something to him. Or the way he found it absolute natural sitting together with him on their balcony at a late Sunday breakfast, pouring him some coffee – all he would have to do was lean a bit more forward and brush their lips together. And he would have done it – almost._   
_“Daisuke? Everything all right?” Satoshi asked, his face mirroring a little worry._   
_Of course he would notice, Daisuke berated himself, he wasn’t exactly acting normal lately._   
_“I’m fine,” he murmured._   
_Satoshi nodded. He had never tried to pry, and Daisuke was thankful for it. On the other hand – he had been a police officer …_   
_“You know you can talk to me, Dai,” Satoshi said conversationally, picking up his newspaper._   
_“Yeah, I know. It’s just… I have some processing to do on my own for now, okay?”_   
_“Whenever you’re ready.”_   
_“Thanks.”//_

“You’re really dense sometimes, you know that, Niwa?” Krad chuckled.  
“Sure. But I didn’t want to hurt Satoshi by trying something, and then telling him, sorry doesn’t work out, let’s be friends again. That would’ve hardly been fair. So I … “

 _//“Now, now, Dai-chan, what an honor. What brings you to my humble abode? Come in, come in, no need to stay in the hallway.”_   
_Emmett opened the door wide and made a flourishing gesture. Daisuke hesitantly stepped into the little apartment. He had been here once before and the overall impression he had gotten was – gay. Plush. Pink. Overwhelming. All Emmett, in one word, like the guy himself. Emmett guided him to a couch covered with a pink – of course – flokati-like blanket._   
_“What can I offer you? Coffee, tea, me? Since it’s too early for Martini anyway.”_   
_“A tea would be fine, thank you.”_   
_Emmett changed his stance and started to list. “Okay, then you can choose between Earl Grey, Assam, Broken Orange Pekoe first flush, green tea Gunpowder, Redbush vanilla… “_   
_Daisuke couldn’t help it – he had to grin.  Just Emmett._   
_“What if I had said coffee?”_   
_“Well, dummy, what do you think: Arabica, South-American blend, Cappuccino, Latte Macchiato – with Amaretto flavor, I may add – Espresso…”_   
_“And what if I had chosen you?”_   
_A broad grin split Emmett’s face._   
_“Be still my beating heart… there’s hope! With or without whipped cream, cherry on top – or if you like the stronger kind, plain black leather... I can offer high heels?”_   
_“Thank you sooo much for that image. A plain green tea will do for now.”_   
_“Just give me a minute.”_   
_A little while later, Daisuke sipped at his surprisingly good tea._   
_“Now, Dai honey, what can I do for you?”_   
_“Uhm … “_   
_“Oh, oh, let me guess – a matter of the heart? Or rather the body? Whatever it is, talk to uncle Emmett.”_   
_“Emmett!”_   
_“You were thinking about what I said, hm?”_   
_Emmett’s voice had lost its playfulness. Daisuke felt the other man’s eyes rest on him thoughtfully._   
_“Yeah, I did. And I… I don’t know what to do.”_   
_“Whatever your heart says, honey,” Emmett answered quietly._   
_“Emmett, I’ve never been with a man, I’ve never even given it a thought. And now I look at Satoshi – my best friend. We’ve been through a lot together, believe it or not, and it was the foundation of our friendship. I don’t want to risk something like that for a… a fling, just because I’m curious. I don’t want to hurt Satoshi. He has been hurt enough in the past.”_   
_“That he has,” Emmett agreed._   
_“He told you?”_   
_“Not everything, just mentioned one or two things, enough for me to guess. He wasn’t a happy kid, was he?”_   
_Daisuke shook his head._   
_“Not really. His stepfather – abused him. Not physically, but no less painful. He had to grow up before his time, had no chance to be a kid. He’s bearing scars, I don’t want to add another.”_   
_“Do you love him, Niwa Daisuke?”_   
_Daisuke looked at Emmett, saw a seriousness in the other man he hadn’t spotted before, and suddenly he understood why he and Satoshi were friends. Emmett bore scars of his own._   
_“I… I think so, yes. “_   
_“Okay, you think so. Let’s play twenty questions, will you? Do you want Satoshi to be different in any way? More open, or reserved, whatever?”_   
_“No.”_   
_“That was spontaneous, very good. Now, can you imagine a life without Satoshi in it?”_   
_“No.”_   
_“You’re doing great here. Are you feeling disgust when you imagine touching him?”_   
_Daisuke hesitated. Disgust, no. Embarrassment yes. He told Emmett so._   
_“And what about him touching you?”_   
_“Uhm, Emmett… isn’t this a little personal?”_   
_“Not at all. See, if you can’t touch him or stand the image of him touching you, the entire discussion is futile.”_   
_“It’s a fantasy of mine,” Daisuke murmured, blushing._   
_“Uh, you did make progress, huh? Daisuke, let me tell you one thing about Hikari Satoshi – he doesn’t sleep with men.”_   
_“Huh? He’s gay… “_   
_“So? He… needs a little human contact every now and then, that’s when he goes out, meets special people. I’m one of them. But let me tell you, he rarely kisses, and he doesn’t sleep with others. He just touches.”_   
_Emmett leaned forward and held his gaze, face serious, voice too._   
_“Daisuke, Satoshi is already lonely. He’s waiting for you to make up your mind. He loves you. He has for five years, has waited for five years, and quite certainly will wait another five or more. And then what? You’ve seen the scene, it’s a cold world. It’s rare to find love, especially when you’re getting older. We're still young, but in ten years, in fifteen? How do you think Satoshi will end up? As an elderly gay man cruising bars every few weeks when he needs someone to hold him, and he will end up picking some young handsome face for a cold fuck in a hotel room, if he’s lucky. If he’s not it will be an alley, or the back of a car. If you love him, go to him. If not…” Emmett shrugged. “Maybe then you should let him go on.”_   
_Daisuke stared at the other man, wide-eyed and horrified with the emotionless picture he had drawn. Was it true? Would Satoshi… become like his father, cold, detached, lonely, a little voice whispered, and Daisuke shuddered._   
_“… no…”//_

Krad regarded him steadily, silent but very attentive to his recollections.  
“That was some wake-up call," Daisuke sighed. "But Emmett hit bull’s eye. I couldn’t let him go… and I couldn’t accept his feelings, or the feelings I had developed for him. Damned if I did, damned if I didn’t. So I did the same as you.”  
“As me? Niwa…“  
Daisuke grinned.

 _//When Daisuke came home after the talk it was already dark. He had walked through town, trying to get the images Emmett had drawn for him out of his head._   
_Satoshi …_   
_His friend had changed so much during the last five years, from a scrawny pale boy who didn’t seem to know how to smile, let alone laugh, to a healthy young man with a nicely shaped body and both sharp wits and sharp humor. Daisuke knew one thing for certain – he didn’t want Satoshi to lose that. And he didn’t want to lose Satoshi or hurt him._   
_But obviously he already had hurt him._   
_Every day anew, just by being there._   
_Daisuke screwed his eyes shut against the sharp burn he felt inside._   
_What to do?_   
_He sighed. Where was Dark when he needed him?_

 _* * *_

 _Entering the apartment, he all but ran into Satoshi. A very much worried Satoshi._   
_“Dai, where the hell have you been? We wanted to meet after the last course, remember? Did you turn off your cell?”_   
_Right… they had made plans… and he had run off to see Emmett, while Satoshi had waited._   
_“Daisuke?” Satoshi touched one shoulder. “You okay?”_   
_Hands on his shoulders,  an almost painful grip._   
_‘Daisuke, are you feeling any different?’_   
_Intense blue eyes hidden behind large glasses._   
_‘Daisuke, are you all right?’_   
_‘Daisuke, look after yourself.’_   
_A half smile, a look out of the corner of blue eyes._   
_‘I wanted us to be alone._   
_Hands on his shoulders, lips near his ear, a voice whispering._   
_‘Niwa-kun … ‘’_   
_God… he had been so blind._   
_“I’m fine,” Daisuke murmured. “Forgot to switch it on.”_   
_He was like in a daze. So much was making sense now. So much was clearer now._   
_He loves me, Daisuke thought. He loves me… Hikari Satoshi loves me…_   
_“Niwa Daisuke, that thing is supposed to be on so you can be reached – or call others for that matter!” Satoshi scolded him, brows drawn over annoyed eyes. “Where have you been? What happened?”_   
_“I needed some time to think, Sato. I’ll tell you, okay, but not now. Please?”_   
_Satoshi had never been able to deny him anything, and it wasn’t any different now. The other withdrew a little._   
_“You’re really okay?”_   
_“Yeah, really. Promise.”_   
_But it was a lie. Nothing was okay. Well, not everything anyway. Something had changed, had opened his eyes about his best friend, and it would take a while to be ‘okay’. But Daisuke was intent on dealing with it._

 _* * *_

 _Daisuke needed another two days to build up the courage to finally go through with his decision – a decision he knew he had made long ago. And it was time to tell Satoshi now._   
_“Sato?”_   
_Standing in front of his roommate with two bottles of cool beer Daisuke looked down on the man his heart had finally come to recognize. His one true love. It had taken only five years to realize. If Dark had been with him,  they most likely wouldn’t have found each other – or faster, depending on how Dark would have reacted to a same-sex love. Knowing the kaitou, he would have dealt with it the same way he dealt with everything. Diasuke smiled sadly with the memories of his other half. He had Satoshi now, he reminded himself. All Daisuke wanted was to never let go._   
_He just had to tell him._   
_Blue eyes looked at him from behind a pair of much smaller glasses than in the past. Satoshi didn’t really need them, but his eyes grew tired more easily when working at his computer._   
_“How about a break? It’s such a nice evening…“_   
_“Sure. Wanted to take a break anyway, thanks.”_   
_Satoshi reached for the offered drink and followed him onto the balcony, stretching out on the lounger beside him. Daisuke sighed inwardly at the sight of the long legs clad in butter soft, tight jeans. He took a swig from his beer._   
_“Sato…“ he began hesitantly._   
_How to say something like this? By the way, I finally recognized I love you? Uhn-uhn, bad idea._   
_“Yeah?”_   
_“I… I… you know when I came home late a few days ago… “_   
_“Yes?”_   
_“I said I needed to think a few things through… well, I’m done, and now…“_   
_“You want to talk to me about it.”_   
_“Yeah,” Daisuke breathed, playing with a droplet running down his bottle._   
_Satoshi just looked at him, waiting._   
_“That day… when I had the cell switched off… I… I was with Emmett.”_   
_There was a slightly strangled sound coming from Satoshi, but otherwise the other man kept quiet._   
_“I…“ Oh for goodness sake… Daisuke looked at Satoshi openly. “Sato, why don’t you sleep with men?”_   
_Satoshi almost spewed out his drink, coughing. “What? Why don’t I sleep with… men? Dai, news flash – I’m gay. I’m only interested in men.”_   
_Daisuke shook his head. That had come across wrong. “I know. What I meant is – you’ve never taken somebody home, you’ve never had a boyfriend. Why?”_   
_“Dai… I have my reasons, okay?” Satoshi answered evasively, not meeting his eyes._   
_“Don’t tell me it’s because you don’t have time for that kind of thing. You have.”_   
_“Daisuke…“ Now there was a definite warning there._   
_Niwa didn’t heed the warning. He just plunged ahead.  “Emmett told me.”_   
_Blue eyes grew cold and narrowed into slits. “That guy’s toast.”_   
_“Don’t. He’s a good guy. He did it to help you. Sato, you’ve never brought anybody home because you… you couldn’t care enough, right?_   
_“Daisuke, where is this going?”_   
_Okay, Daisuke, that’s it. Say it. Tell him. Then duck and run for cover._   
_“Is it because you… love me, Satoshi?”_   
_His friend froze, then slowly put his bottle onto the floor. He didn’t say anything, he didn’t move a muscle, and the blue eyes were hard as diamonds._   
_“Sato? Please?” Daisuke begged._   
_Satoshi looked at him. To Daisuke he was suddenly the older version of the Satoshi he had met so many years ago. Closed off, face bland, mouth a thin line, eyes distant._   
_Distance._   
_No! Not after all that time! Not after all that crap that had happened to them!_   
_“Sato…?”_   
_“Yes… yes, Daisuke, I love you.“_   
_It wasn’t much more than a whisper, but it was said out loud finally. Emmett had been right, and Daisuke inhaled deeply. Satoshi loved him._   
_He had heard him say it._   
_“And you have for five years?”_   
_“… yes…“_   
_It made sense. Suddenly it all made sense. Daisuke wanted to cry with joy and happiness. Satoshi sat silently, staring at his own hands._   
_“Dai, I… I don’t know what to say. I’m sorry, maybe I should have told you.”_   
_“Yeah,” Daisuke agreed, voice soft. “Maybe you should have.”_   
_“I… tomorrow I’ll move out.”_   
_Huh?_   
_Daisuke’s brain made a full stop and came to a screeching halt. “What? Why?!”_   
_Blue eyes regarded him sadly. “Maybe because I can afford a house on my own? Because I can’t stay here? You wouldn’t want to live with a faggot who’s lusting after you, now would you? I knew it would come to this sooner or later. I cherished our friendship. It… meant more to me than you'd ever be able to understand. Thank you…“_   
_Daisuke’s eyes had widened in shock as he heard his friend talk that way. Oh god, he had taken it all wrong! No, no, no! He didn’t want that, he didn’t want him to move out. And why was he talking so derisively of himself?_   
_“Sato, that’s not what I want. That’s not what I meant… I… god, I don’t know how to say it…“_   
_He leaned over to the other man and shyly brought their lips together._   
_He kissed Satoshi._   
_Satoshi froze._   
_And then he pushed him away roughly.//_

"I hadn't expected that," Daisuke continued softly. “Not at all. I didn’t know what to expect but not that… maybe I thought he’d sink into my arms, no idea… but, well, he was right. From his point of view I was kidding him, cruelly.”  
"You'd never do that," Krad told him, voice serious.  
Daisuke gave him a surprised look. The golden eyes that met his were calm and full of conviction.  
"No," he said softly. "No, I'd never hurt him intentionally."

 _//“What the hell are you thinking, Niwa Daisuke?”_   
_Satoshi's voice was hoarse, and he sounded angry and hurt. Turning his back to Daisuke he stood at the railing, staring out into the night. Hands clenched, knuckles stood out white against the skin._   
_“Why are you making fun of me? Of my feelings for you? I hadn’t expected that from you!”_   
_“God, Sato…no…“_   
_Daisuke rose, carefully stepping behind his friend, reaching out to touch the stiff form, to comfort the pain he had inflicted without intention, but he curled his hand away._   
_Wrong move._   
_Talk, explain._   
_“Satoshi, remember the night before Riku moved?”_   
_A sharp glance, but no reply._   
_“We were out. We visited several bars.”_   
_“So?”_   
_“I saw you, Sato.”_   
_The back grew even more rigid. Satoshi didn’t need to ask what he meant._   
_“I saw you in that bar with an older guy, and he was touching you…“_   
_Satoshi’s figure crumbled a bit._   
_“I…saw that look on your face when he did, when he kissed you, and…“_   
_Daisuke stepped closer, slowly laying his hands on the stiff shoulders. Fingertips brushing over the skin at his neck, slowly pushing the pony tail aside._   
_“I shocked myself that night. I grew jealous.”_   
_He breathed over the exposed neck, seeing Satoshi shiver briefly. Brushing down his friend’s arm and carefully, slowly curling his arm around the other man’s waist he feather-like kissed that neck. He more felt than saw Satoshi close his eyes, inhaling._   
_“Nobody should touch you like that, put that look on your face but me, Sato-chan. I have been blind all these years, but I heard the wake-up call. Emmett can be very convincing.”_   
_Daisuke kissed that neck again, tightened his hold of the other man. When Satoshi turned his face a little he brought their lips together again, fully embracing the slender body, pulling him against himself, caressing the man he loved gently through the shirt._   
_“And then…“ he whispered, finding Satoshi breathing harder. Now or never. “He touched you here.”_   
_One hand slid down a flat abdomen and further south, teasingly, caressing._   
_Daisuke blinked._   
_Satoshi was hard._   
_“And he wouldn’t have stopped if you hadn’t told him to, right? Would have continued to…“_   
_He rubbed slowly, increasing the pressure and felt Satoshi’s hips twitch against his hand. He turned Satoshi in his arms, initiating a kiss again, slowly coaxing the other man into opening up, while he continued._   
_“Nobody ever touches you again like that, Sato, if I have a say in it. Nobody but me.”//_

“And they called me possessive…“ Krad interrupted him, almost grinning.  
Daisuke smiled. "You were possessive, Krad. I just couldn’t tell him I loved him. I had to express it otherwise. And I hardly thought about you that moment.”  
“Hn.”

 _//Satoshi’s arms came up and wrapped themselves around Daisuke as Satoshi buried his face in the crook of his neck, his hot breath brushing over his skin and making him shiver, too. And not because of any cold, on the contrary._   
_“Daisuke… “ Satoshi moaned. “Oh god… Dai!”_   
_Fingers buried into his back, Satoshi made a strangled moaning sound and trembled in his arms, panting roughly. He pushed Daisuke’s hand away, and Daisuke frowned, confused, until he understood._   
_Satoshi had just come._   
_Whoa…_   
_Satoshi looked anywhere but at him, as he tried to free himself from his arms. Daisuke held him only tighter._   
_“Sato, don’t. It’s okay, everything's okay. Please understand, I want this, I want you. I’ve given it so much thought, and now I understand. I understand everything. Please, don’t run. Stay here, stay with me, let’s be together. I… “_   
_Daisuke was at a loss of words at the unguarded look from those deep blue eyes he loved. Had always loved. He simply took the other man’s hand and slid it down his own body, groaning a little at the contact of a hand and his own hardness, separated only by his light summer pants. Satoshi didn’t move, just looked at him for a few seconds more before he took away his hand._   
_“That’s physical attraction,” he muttered hoarsely._   
_“Sato, if that’s the only thing I wanted I could have gone to Emmett. But I don’t want Emmett, or anybody else for that matter, I want you. I care for you, Hikari Satoshi, a great deal. I feel the same for you as you do for me. Give me a chance? Give us a chance?” he begged._   
_Satoshi inhaled._   
_“I need a shower,” he said and finally pushed away._   
_Daisuke let him go, watching the slender young man walk back into the house, then he followed._

 _*_

 _Daisuke was in Satoshi's room, waiting, when Hikari came out of the bathroom, and his eyes grew wide. Oh yes, he had seen him in several states of undress before, but this was almost like his secret fantasy – Satoshi didn’t wear anything but a towel around the waist, his hair was tied, and he looked simply edible. This was it._   
_“Daisuke…“ Satoshi began._   
_Daisuke interrupted him. “I wasn’t sure if I should present myself in the nude or not, so I decided on a compromise, “ he joked._   
_He had opened his shirt and exchanged his long pants with a pair of shorts – without anything underneath. Just in case – in any case._   
_“Daisuke, I…“_   
_“Sato. I’d very much like to see you. May I?”_   
_Satoshi inhaled and his features were shifting between want, need and embarrassment._   
_“Daisuke, wait. This is a little much, a little sudden. What had brought this on?”_   
_“Emmett.”_   
_“How so?”_   
_“He opened my eyes for the obvious. I hadn’t wanted to see it, Sato, though on some level I knew. You weren’t that subtle back then, too. Emmett just asked me how long I planned on letting you wait. You did wait for me, didn’t you?”_   
_Satoshi nodded slowly._   
_“I know this is sudden, but… yes, I am sure. Absolutely, finally. I want to be with you, Hikari Satoshi, from now on till… uh, I don’t know, eternity?”_   
_Satoshi came closer, allowed him to pull him down to him on the bed and slowly undo the towel._   
_“Let’s take this slow? We don’t need to rush anything.” Daisuke met the blue eyes, smiling, running a gentle hand over the warm skin within his reach._   
_Those sky eyes lit up with emotions Daisuke had seen there before but which he had never interpreted the correct way. He saw the warmth and the need and the hunger, but also the love._   
_“Who wants to rush?" Satoshi murmured roughly. "I waited five years, now, that I have you, I plan on taking my time.”_   
_And then there were lips on his and hands on his body, everywhere, caressing him, teasing him, and they were Satoshi’s._   
_Finally.//_

Krad stared at him, still looking a little shell shocked. Daisuke smirked.  
“I wasn’t able to say the three little words for another year, can you believe that? And we didn’t rush things either. We didn’t sleep together the entire time. When we finally did, it was our anniversary, and… oh well, let’s just say it didn’t went as I had planned it. But when I saw him standing there in his wet clothes, looking so happy, I just knew. I said it that night, when he took me. It was what I felt for him, still do, and I don’t see that change anytime soon. He’s my life, Krad. My everything.”  
The demon inhaled shakily at the words, the same ones he had used to claim Satoshi as his.  
“If what you feel for Dark is only a little bit like what I feel for Satoshi, tell him. Life is too short, and maybe you regret it one day.”  
“Our life isn’t short.”  
“Maybe not, but… you already regret it, don’t you?”  
Krad kept silent for some time, then whispered, “Dark told me what he saw when he looked at Unity. He said, ‘it's what we should be. The two of us. Together.’ I didn’t understand it, I still don’t.”  
Daisuke sat forward in the chair, meeting the confused golden gaze. “Krad, the two of you were a unity once, and I’m sure on a deep level you craved that all those decades, missed him. He’s the other half of your soul, as Satoshi is mine. You two just needed three hundred years to understand that. If circumstances had been different… “  
Krad nodded. If circumstances had been different and he hadn’t turned out the way he had… if he had killed Dark… or if they hadn’t been separated again… there were so many ‘if’s’.  
Daisuke yawned and got to his feet. He had talked a lot tonight, had given Krad even more to think about, and now was the moment for the tactical retreat.  
“I think my other half is already waiting for me. And since it’s late already and tomorrow is New Year, I call it a day. Good night, Krad.”  
“Good night, Daisuke.”  
“Don’t wait too long. You’re… tired already.”  
Krad just nodded wordlessly and turned back to watching the night through the attic window. Daisuke smiled a little and left, descending the stairs to their shared bedroom.

* * *

The following day being New Year’s eve both Daisuke and Satoshi dressed up to go into town for a little celebration, a few drinks, maybe meet some friends. They invited Dark and Krad along, and the kaitou enthusiastically took the invitation.  
Krad refused.  
“What are you planning to do instead?” Satoshi asked, and Krad gestured at the books all around him.  
“There’s a lot for me to do.”  
Satoshi smiled that little half smile Krad knew from the past. “I never picked you to be the intellectual kind, Krad.”  
“Apart from being a maniacal psychotic killer I liked to read every chance I could get, Satoshi. There weren’t that many.”  
Satoshi winced a little. "Krad…" he started.  
The demon shook his head, smiling, a sad inflection to the expression. "Don't, Sato. It's the past."  
Their eyes met in silent understanding and Satoshi inhaled briefly.  
"I understand your thirst for knowledge, Krad," he said silently, "but sometimes life happens outside as well."  
"I know," was the equally silent reply. "But right now, I'd like to live in here."  
“Well, we'll be back before midnight.”  
“Have fun, Cinderella.”  
Satoshi chuckled at the remark, waved, and left the library.

Krad retreated with a book and a large mug of hot chocolate to one of the large couch chairs in the living room upstairs. It was hard to believe for him, too, but he actually liked the peace and quiet, and somehow he found he was glad Satoshi had decided to move, giving everyone their own rooms. Sure, Daisuke had been right, his room didn’t contain more than a bed, but usually he didn’t even use that. He preferred returning to his host. And reading. He wasn’t sure the others understood his motives – hell, he hadn’t even tried to explain them, wasn’t even sure about them. As he wasn’t sure about many things.  Krad craved knowledge, not material things. Possessions could be withdrawn, but nobody could take away knowledge. That he had learned early on, and since he had found he only needed to read a text once and be able to recite it word by word, he had taken every chance he could get.  
Unlike Dark.  
Dark…  
Krad’s eyes drifted away from the book and out into the night. It was cold and crisp, the stars were glittering on a velvety blue sky, almost violet.  
… Like eyes…  
A certain pair of violet eyes, twinkling with amusement and mischief, clouding with pain, glassy with moisture, dark with…  
…Dark…  
Master thief Dark Mousy…  
Krad couldn’t suppress the chuckle. Nobody knew where that nickname came from… except for Dark and himself.  He had given it to Dark once, in a caricature of an endearment, a belittlement. Thinking of which, Dark had never commented it.  
Krad closed his eyes, thinking of former encounters with Dark, when all his sense in life had been to fight the kaitou... no, not really. He had wanted him to become a part of himself once again, had wanted to live.  
Now he did live. He was alive.  
And Dark was still there, a part of that life, a center of warmth and reassurance. With a velvety soft voice that ran like honey over his spine sometimes, with eyes that looked at him in a way they had never before, sincere and caring, lips that simply cried to be kissed.  He wondered how Dark would feel.  
Oh, he knew how it felt to have the kaitou near. Dark had held him before, but… to run his fingers over that firm chest, caress skin instead of marking it with knives and swords, to hear that voice scream in ecstasy, not hatred…  
Krad’s eyes flew open and he tossed the book aside, staring at his groin in alarm.  
What the…?  
Krad let his head sink against the headrest of the chair, groaning miserably. Just thinking about Dark’s skin had made him…  
…twitch…  
Great. Krad moaned again and spread his legs a little, trying to get more comfortable with the unknown sensation. It felt… good, though.  Interesting. Krad’s eyes slid shut again as he recalled the feeling of Dark’s lips on his own, and his fingers involuntarily slid into his lap, brushing over the hard length.  
Oh god…  it felt good.  
And all of this by simply thinking about Dark?  
Krad sighed… and slowly undid his button. His hand slid into his pants and he gasped when his fingers made contact with his arousal. He had never felt anything like this before, at least not first hand. Sure, sometimes he had received some sensations through his host, but never… never…  
Krad arched involuntarily into his own touch, hearing himself moan far away. He never had been aware inside his hosts long enough. There had always been things more important and he had never wasted a single thought on his own pleasure. Fingers dancing over himself in an age-old rhythm, his thoughts drifted away, headed in a certain direction, and it wasn’t his own hand anymore…  
There were lips on his, hands caressing him where he had never been touched before…  
“… Dark…,“ Krad sobbed as his climax hit him out of nowhere.

* * *

It was fifteen minutes to go until the new year’s arrival when the others came back home, Satoshi and Daisuke smiling at each other, Dark beaming with pure delight. Krad felt a smile tug at his lips when he watched his other half, utterly relaxed, violet eyes dancing with joy.  He noticed the way Dark’s features would soften when he glanced at him rather carefully and had to hide a smile himself.  
He had had a nice... revealing evening himself, and he felt his body still tingle with the remembrance. He wanted the man to touch him, the fingers and lips and hands, to be Dark’s. He wanted it so badly, it scared and delighted him in one.  
Krad had no idea if Dark had ever experienced something like it himself, but somehow he doubted it. They had never had a physical form. All sensations had come through the host and now... now they were corporeal. They had a body, even if it was still just energy. They could feel, touch, taste... Krad had been denied these sensations because his hosts had denied him. Dark had been the luckier of the two of them. He had had a life of sorts, but not like it was now either.  
Adding this to the things Daisuke had told him the other day had made him think. Krad was as scared as he had never been before; not even the moment when Dark had sealed them back into the Black Wings, not even the moment the entity from the Wheel of Dagan had tortured them, had frightened him that much.  
He was free. He had the freedom of choice and life, but the choice he wanted to make was frightening. It would mean opening himself completely to Dark. No reservations, no more shields. Of course, the kaitou had seen him at his worst, knew his past, knew the pain and agony and horrors, but to trust him with his... emotions? With love...?  
It was as if he was fighting those invisible burning chains again, and he was tired of it. He was tired of the fear and the past horror, the hesitation.  
And he made a decision.

Stepping out onto the balcony – funny, in this household important decisions seemed to call for balconies, Krad mused – he watched the stars as if looking for support. He would need strength for this. Krad didn’t turn as he heard the others appear behind him, felt the coat being slipped onto his shoulders.  
“You’re freezing,” Dark muttered.  
He gave the other a mild frown. "Temperatures don’t affect us.“  
Dark grinned. "You looked cold.“  
Krad met the almost black eyes, then smiled. “Thanks.”  
“Fireworks are starting in a minute.”  
“I can’t remember having seen them before.”  
“I did. They’re beautiful, look.”  
Dark pointed into the night sky, where red and golden and green lights were exploding, blue sparks glittered, illuminating the scenery in an unearthly light.  
“You’re right. They are beautiful.”  
Krad looked at the amazing display, simple but yet so captivating. All around them people greeted the new year, laughed and cheered and shot fireworks into the sky.  
“Happy New Year,” Dark said quietly, smiling at him.  
Krad looked into the expressive eyes. “Dark?”  
“Hn?”  
“Kiss me.”  
Violet eyes widened, searching his, question and confusion written all over Dark’s face. Hesitantly the kaitou came closer, lips almost cautiously brushing over his, before he pulled back.  
It tingled. It felt good.  
“Dark?”  
“Yes?”  
“You can do better than that.”  
Krad reached out, weaving his fingers in the thick dark strands and pulled his soon-to-be lover close, sealing their lips together. He felt Dark gasp in surprise but then the other man reacted, responded in kind, and damn if he’d let him go now. Krad moaned silently as Dark opened up under him, and he ran his hands over the hard body that melted against his, and it felt good and so right, and why the hell had he waited so long?  
Around them the fireworks continued, but Krad really couldn’t care less.

Satoshi nudged his lover with one elbow, silently gesturing toward the entangled and suddenly very much occupied pair. Daisuke grinned and leaned into his lover's embrace. They stayed outside, watching the display of light a bit longer, then went inside.  
They had a celebration of their own today.

Dark felt Krad's hands caressing his back, his lips on his own and he sighed silently. A hot tongue flicked over his lips in a silent request and instinctively he opened, invitation clear. It was taken and he sank into the embrace, melted against a body that perfectly matched his own.  Closing his arms around the slender form of the man he loved – god yes, he did love Krad, why hadn’t he seen it before? – and despite the outside temperature he felt heat coil inside of him.  
Krad moaned, pressing himself even closer, hands wandering over his sides, back, deeper – whoa… he pulled back a little.  
“Krad…“ he breathed, only to find his mouth sealed once again.  
There was hunger in each of Krad’s kisses. Hunger and need and so much more.  
“Krad… wait… what brought this on? Not that I’m complaining…“  
Golden eyes glowed with a fire Dark had never seen like this before. In battle, yes. The thrill, the adrenaline, but now there was an addition to that fire. It was what Dark had always hoped to see.  
“Let’s just say I had a revelation, okay?” Krad purred, fingers caressing over Dark’s cheek.  
“Fine with me…“ the kaitou answered, catching Krad’s lips again, letting himself get swept away by the rising emotions.  
Damn, the other was a good kisser. He wondered where he had gotten it from. Then again, they could adapt from their hosts.  
Shit, Daisuke, Satoshi must be one hell of a kisser, Dark thought dimly.  
Those nimble fingers slid under his pullover, met warm skin that was now briefly exposed to the cold air, but Dark felt no discomfort. Only the rising heat.  
"Krad… uhm…”  
“Your place or mine?” Krad whispered, flicking a tongue over his lower lip, and Dark had to inhale deeply.  
That man had turned from reluctant to extremely hot and sexy in a heartbeat. Dark had always thought he would be the one to overrun Krad, but as it was... Damn, he had danced around the man, taken it slow, given him time – and look what had happened, a voice whispered happily.  
“Mine,“ he murmured. "At least I’ve got a carpet.”  
“Oh, I don’t think we need a carpet just yet… a bed will do…” Krad grinned mischievously.  
Dark felt his body heat up even more at the suggestion in those golden eyes and he let Krad pull him into the house. He faintly remembered Daisuke and Satoshi being outside as well, but that thought was annihilated immediately.  
The door closed behind them and Dark looked around the bare room, eyes on the bed. A thrill shivered through him, coupled with a strange kind of apprehension. He had never done this before, just like his other half, and suddenly the apprehension doubled.  
Strong fingers slid over his shoulders, lips kissed his neck.  
“Krad…“ he whispered.  
“Hm?”  
His coat was pulled off and he was in the arms of his lover. Golden eyes regarded him calmly, radiating warmth and security. When had the tables turned? When had Krad become the leading element in this dance that Dark had started?  
 “Let’s just get to bed, Dark Mousy,” the demon murmured, nipping at his lips.  
Krad led him to the large bed and both stripped down to their t-shirts, Dark’s eyes never leaving the lean, muscular form. The apprehension was still there, coupled with anticipation. Krad pulled him close, kissing him, and they slipped under the covers.  
"Just sleep," the blond murmured.

*

Dark snuggled against the body he had held in his arms before, but at that time Krad had either been out of it or deeply disturbed by something. This time he was allowed to hold him, feel him, touch him, the only thing between them their t-shirts. Dark closed his eyes, feeling Krad’s breath on the skin of his arm, depth indicating the demon had fallen asleep. They had caressed and stroked each other between kisses, getting used to just having the other one close.  
Sure, he had touched the demon before. He had fought against him, slammed into the lithe form, battling him, wrestling him to the ground and trying to defeat him. And he had held him, had enveloped him in his embrace, in his arms and with his wings, but at that time there had been nothing sexual about it. Now there were no negative feelings between them. Now there was only tenderness.  
He inhaled, enjoying the faint scent of his lover that somehow reminded him of apples and something spicy… pure Krad. He had never consciously noticed it… and with that thought Dark slowly drifted off.

* * *

The next morning Dark was woken up due to the touch of a pair of gentle lips on his own. Purring he wrapped his arms around the other person, opening up under the kiss, feeling the response almost immediately. Krad deepened the kiss, making Dark pull back in the need of air soon.  
Opening his eyes he found himself watched closely by golden eyes. He met the fascinating gaze, wondering why Krad’s eyes were golden for the first time. Feline and predatory, but able to express such gentleness like right now. No longer cold and distant, touched by insanity. He noticed the small swirls of greenish gold that were around the black, cat-like pupils. At the moment, in the twilight of the room, the oval shape had widened to a rounder one.  
“Morning,” Dark whispered.  
“Good morning.”  
Krad returned to his former actions and hell, if Dark had anything against that, on the contrary. Krad’s hands were traveling again, and Dark didn’t hold back either. And then he felt a hand slip under his shirt.  
“Krad…“ he started, only to gasp in surprise when a jolt of pleasure ran though his body.  
Dear god!  
Krad had found a nipple, brushing his fingertips over it again, making Dark moan. A knee was pushed gently between his thighs, parting them, pressing against his growing hardness.  
“Krad…“ he whispered again, almost pleading, and then coherent thought fled him as he was kissed again; quite thoroughly too.  
He felt Krad shift, the pressure on his groin increase, the heat rising. Krad’s fingers were on his skin, touching him, stroking him…  
Dark exploded with a hoarse strangled cry and the world exploded with him.

Slowly coming back to himself he was aware of the body in his arms. Krad had his face buried into his neck and was breathing hard, too, and his back was slick with sweat.  
“Krad?”  
His lover stirred lazily, golden half-open eyes glancing at him like a large cat. Only the purr was missing and Krad was probably close to doing that now, too. Pushing himself up on his elbows, the blond looked down at him.  
“What was that…?” Dark asked softly.  
Not that he didn’t know, well, not first hand anyway. He didn’t peek with Daisuke and Satoshi, but he had felt the results. They had felt good already, but having it happen to him had truly floored him.  
“A revelation?” Krad suggested and bent down for a kiss again.  
A revelation? One hell of one! He had never thought it would be this good. He had only known that he needed Krad, that he couldn’t be without him, that there was a hunger only the demon could satisfy, and he had done just that. In a way Dark would never have believed possible.  
"You had one yourself?“ he asked, pushing back a strand of hair from the handsome face.  
Krad smiled. "Yes. While thinking of you.“  
Dark grinned cheekily. "Damn, I’m good.“  
"That you are, kaitou,“ was the husky reply and Krad traced his lips with his fingers.  
Dark nipped at the playful fingers, licking at the pads, and Krad leaned down to capture his lips in a new kiss. One of his hands brushed over Dark’s ribcage, traveling up and down in a soothing pattern and the kaitou stretched underneath him, humming with delight.  
His shirt was the next to go, revealing him to the intense gaze. He was kissed, those kisses wandering down his neck and to his throat. Dark pushed himself against his lover, wanting and needing more despite the release he had felt before.  
"Krad,“ he groaned.  
"Yes?“ came the soft rumbled.  
He smiled at the demon. "You’re not so bad yourself.“  
Krad chuckled, but suddenly his eyes fell on the mark on Dark’s right shoulder. Brows drew down and pain was visible in the formerly so hungry eyes.

Krad’s fingers lingered over the faint white scar on the other otherwise so smooth, faintly tanned skin. It was long, jagged, speaking of a deep wound by a sharp blade. That was exactly what it was. He had pushed the Link Pin of Time into Dark’s right shoulder, twisting it, making the other scream in a pain that was his alone. No host to buffer it. Dark had been alone inside the human body, trying to save Daisuke at the time, trapped in the world of the Second Hand of Time, and Krad had nearly beaten him. Satoshi had stopped him with an immense effort, but it had been close.  
So close.  
He ran shaky finger tips along the proof of his madness, a proof that had remained on Dark because it had hit him all alone. Inside, something twisted with the memories and he fought not to cry out as that time replayed over and over, as he looked into the face of his enemy, a grimace of pain, hearing the agonized yell as he drove the sword even deeper.  
Strong fingers caught his, pulling them away from the mark. A mark that was on Dark’s body now, too. Through the separation he had transferred the same scar his host bore to himself.  
Violet eyes bore into golden ones and Krad caught his breath.  
"It’s in the past,“ Dark murmured, kissing the questing finger tips.  
"That doesn’t mean it’s forgotten.“  
"No, but it has healed.“  
Krad tore his gaze away, straying to the white scar. "Things like these never heal.“ Pain wormed into his voice and something inside of him curled into a tight fist. "How can you feel anything toward me but hatred?“  
Dark’s eyes flew open and he stared at him. "Krad, no!“  
"All I ever did was hurt... My hosts, you...“  
Dark pulled him close, the shock of the more intense physical contact breaking off whatever Krad had wanted to add.  
"I feel a lot toward you, Krad. A lot. None of it has anything to do with hatred or loathing. What happened in the past is history. It was a senseless fight, born out of desperation and fear and the simple fact that I didn’t understand – and because we didn’t know differently.“ He brushed his lips against Krad’s. "Now we do know differently.“ He caressed the slender form and Krad shivered with longing. "We all bear scars. Mine are just on the outside.“  
Krad buried his head against one slender shoulder, feeling skin against skin, warmth that was more physical than he could ever have thought.  
"I don’t understand you most of the time. I really don’t.“  
"I don’t understand myself either. That’s the fun of life.“ Dark grinned cheekily and Krad could only chuckle.

* * *

By the time Daisuke and Satoshi made it out of bed it was already close to noon on New Year’s Day, but neither cared. Of their demons there was no sign – which was actually a good sign.  
Breakfast was a lazy affair.  
Daisuke was pouring himself another cup of coffee when Satoshi finally breached a topic he had been trying to talk to his lover about ever since ist revelation on Christmas.  
"Dai?“  
"Hm?“  
"You know that Kei was my step-father, right?“  
Eyebrows dipped a little and Daisuke put down the pot. "Yes,“ he answered slowly.  
"My mother died when I was four and I always believed my father had died before her.“  
Now the brows dipped even deeper.  
"He isn’t dead, Daisuke.“  
Wide, brown eyes stared at him. "He’s not?“  
"No. According to Krad he’s alive.“  
"How... how does he know?“ Daisuke sputtered.  
Satoshi smiled slightly. "Kei apparently kept a file on him, for whatever reason. Krad saw it throughout the times he had taken over my body while I was asleep. He says he knows his name and where he lived some years ago.“  
"Damn...“ Daisuke breathed. "So you... want to go look for him?“  
Satoshi evaded his eyes. "I don’t know.“  
"He’s your father!“  
"And he had a reason why he left my mother when I was only two. He must have had a damn good one. Why should I go look for him when he never did the same?“ Satoshi snapped back, surprised by his own rising emotions concerning that topic.  
He had never thought much about his father. He had been a bright child even at the age of four and he had understood that Hiwatari Kei wasn’t his real father, but he had cared for him just the same. He had never tried to find out where his birth parent had gone off to. Why should he? It had been apparent to him that the man had wanted nothing to do with his son.  
"Maybe he didn’t know where your mother had gone to?“ Daisuke suggested. "She had a new husband, a new name... you had a new name...“  
He shook his head. "It’s history. I don’t really want to unearthe the family ghosts. One demon is enough.“ He smiled a little at that.  
Daisuke regarded him steadily. "If your stepfather had the file, it’s on the old computer, right? Maybe you should at least read it.“  
Satoshi sighed a little. "Maybe. Not now. I just... wanted you to know. And in case I do want to find him...“  
"I’ll be there,“ Daisuke finished the sentence when his lover stopped, unsure.  
"Thank you.“  
Daisuke gave him a warm smile.  
"Mornin’.“  
The tired greeting had them both turn and smile almost simultaneously as they discovered their respective demons. Dark looked downright exhausted, his hair in wild disarray, eyes hooded. He was yawning despite the late hour. Krad looked a bit more awake, thought even his normally so neat style was more mussed that usual. His pony tail was in place, though. While Dark shuffled over to Daisuke to steal a some coffee, Krad met the blue eyes of his host. It was as if he had felt the brief flare of emotional upheaval.  
He probably had, Satoshi mused.  
"Sato?“ Krad inquired softly, barely loud enough for him to hear.  
"I’m fine,“ he replied.  
Warm hands landed on his shoulders and squeezed them gently, reassuringly. Strong fingers massaged the slightly stiff muscles and Satoshi began to relax, shooting his demon a little smile.  
"Thanks,“ he mouthed.  
"Hey, I’m jealous here,“ Dark pouted.  
Krad shot the other entity a mischievous smile. "Oh really?“  
"Yeah!“  
"Didn’t get enough?“  
Satoshi snickered and Daisuke hid behind his coffee mug.  
"You know I’m insatiable.“  
"Yes, that I do.“ Krad’s expression was seductive. "But right now I’d rather be with my host.“  
Satoshi almost broke out laughing. If anyone was listening in, it sounded like a threesome or worse.  
Without much fuss, the demon merged back with his host to recharge. Satoshi welcomed him, wrapped himself around his tired symbiote, and Krad hummed softly.  
//You’re bad// he chuckled.  
//Born that way// Krad replied with an evil smirk.  
//Had fun?//  
Waves of satisfaction and warmth lapped at the fringes of his perception.  
//Yeah, I guess you did. Good for you//  
//Very good for me// Krad agreed. //Thank you for everything//  
//You’re welcome, Krad. Very much//  
After a moment of silence, Krad came slightly closer. //Is everything okay, Sato?//  
Satoshi knew his demon was picking up on the echoes of his thoughts, of what he had talked about with Daisuke, but Krad did nothing more than to curl closer, solid and warm and supportive. He was glad for it.  
"Unfair!“ Dark’s protest drew him back to the real world. "Without a good-bye kiss?“  
Satoshi smirked. "Want me to kiss you instead?“  
Dark grimaced. "No way.“  
Daisuke’s mock glare added to the statement. "Exactly. No way. No one kisses you but me.“  
"Is that so?“  
Daisuke just leaned close, caught his head with one hand and kissed him. "Yes, that’s so,“ he muttered.  
"In that case...“  
Satoshi initiated another kiss, a deeper one, tasting the coffee flavor in his lover’s mouth.  
//Possessive// Krad teased.  
//Who? Me?//  
//Both// came the laughing reply.  
//Learned from the best//  
Krad smirked a little, then retreated to recharge his energy levels and rest. Outside, Dark merged with his own host, muttering about the unfairness of the world in general and lovers in particular.  
The two humans chuckled and Daisuke caressed his lover’s cheek.  
"Happy New Year,“ he murmured.  
Satoshi only smiled. Yes, happy new year. And maybe, one day in this new year, he would want to get to know his birth father.


End file.
